I used to expect life to be perfect. That high expectation for perfection in everything and everyone (most of all towards myself) spilled into my parenting when the kids came along.
I soon learnt that kids and perfectionism do not go together.
You could have a perfectly neat and clean house, only to be messed up within minutes when there are kids at home.
Or a day planned perfectly with a long to-do list, only to realise that you could not even get pass point 1 and dinner’s got to be served.
This year has passed by in a blur. Jay started primary one and Elly started preschool in January. Zac transitioned into primary three, with a slightly heavier workload and after school activities.
Before we knew it, we’re in the middle of December!
With three kids at home during the school holiday, I found my perfectionism streak acting up again. I became frustrated by the mess, the disruption in my schedule, the interruption when I tried to get some work done. I snapped at the kids, yelled at them, scolded them when they bickered and fought.
The mess. Oh the mess. I could not stand the mess and the chaos.
Then I realised, that life is messy. Life can get chaotic.
If you’re waiting for the perfect moment before you could be happy, wait on. It will never come.
December, the month we celebrate Christmas – the birth of Jesus.
And I realised, that when Jesus was born, there was no room available for Mary to give birth. He was born in a stinky manger.
The mess. Oh the mess. Jesus was born into this messy world, into our messy life. He embraced our mess. I thought that is so beautiful.
Life does not have to be perfect to be beautiful.
Kids do not have to be perfect to be loved.
Parenting can be a messy and chaotic journey. The perfectionist in me need to loosen up and not be too uptight about living a perfect life and having perfect kids.
That’s a great thought for a perfectionist to end the year with!